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Monday, September 1, 2014
More Than Just Depression?
I am a 17 year old female and my entire life I`ve suspected there`s something wrong with me. As a kid I suffered from horrible panic attacks nightly where I believed "ghosts" were in my room. My heart would feel like it was going to explode. Those thankfully lessened as I got older but I still have a lot of trouble sleeping. I am often restless and always exhausted. Sometimes I`ll convince myself of things that are ridiculous like mind reading, ghosts or even me having supernatural powers. Now I can look back and think how stupid that is but when it happens it feels so real. I find it so incredibly hard to be around people, I`ve never been close to anyone including my parents. I have a lot of trouble concentrating especially when writing because my mind has trouble focusing. When I was a kid I was very hyperactive and very aggressive. My parents were told I should be tested for ADHD but I never ended up being tested. When I was 13-14 this changed. I`m still agressive but now I have next to no energy and I very rarely leave the house. I used to cut myself and often think of suicide but not in a serious way. I have a terrible temper. I find myself screaming over trivial things. I have a little patience. I am physically repulsive. Most of the time when I`m thinking about suicide it`s because of my appearance. I have difficulty retaining information. only within the past year have I been able to go two days without crying. Sometimes I`ll "break" I`ll scream to myself and cry and do weird things like paint on myself or cut myself or take pills. And like with believing in weird things, I can look back when it`s not happening and see how weird it is but when it`s happening it kind of consumes me. People in my class believe that I think people hate me more than they do. Is there something wrong with me?
Anyways sorry for the long rambling question, I hope some of it made sense. Thanks
Thank you for visiting NetWellness. I think you likely have some significant mental concerns and that you need to see a mental health professional for a complete evaluation! I can't diagnose depression, anxiety or another serious mental illness over the internet, but I strongly encourage you to seek help soon.
Thoughts of suicide are often a sign of extreme distress but something that can be treated. I would strongly encourage you to do one or more of the following as soon as possible:
1. Call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 (website: http://www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org/help/default.aspx), which is free, confidential and staffed by trained counselors who are available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week.
2. Call or go to your local hospital emergency room.
3. If you are in treatment, call your mental health professional.
Take good care.
Nancy Elder, MD
College of Medicine
University of Cincinnati